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Marvin the Martian

The recent blast of biting winter weather battering North America has produced several statistical anomalies.  For example, on December 27, the temperature in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan fell to -45°F. Meanwhile, the temperature on Mars on that very same day reached a relatively pleasant -20°F. In fact, during the last week of 2017, the fourth planet from the sun consistently recorded warmer daytime temperatures than most of Canada.  But the suddenly balmy Martian afternoons aren't the only positive aspect of the Red Planet. Mars also features plenty of fresh drinking water at its poles, and most scientists now believe the planet's distinctive red hue comes about because its surface is encrusted with valuable rubies.  Truthfully, with our current cold spell the only reason NASA engineers can come up with for not visiting and colonizing the planet is that we would have to share it with the guy pictured above.